Mal De Ojo- Evil Eye

So yeah I think I have ppl in my circle or should I say my space that cause the universe to go against me. You are probably thinking I am crazy but trust me whenever something is going right and I share it with someone else it goes left! Its the small details that I am like wtf. Let me give you some examples.

I got offered a job.It would have been a 15k upgrade! It was in an email and all that its not like it was talked and spectulations. I also swore up and down that another place I interviewed at would call me back and I thought I would have "good problems" you know the type of problems where you have to sit and think of the BEST choice. Well let me tell you what happened - I got nothing. The offer was a miscommunication and they spoke prematurely and I did not want the offer they gave me. The other job didn't even call me.

I moved and brought a new furniture. I had a master plan drawn out and all these decorating ideas. The move was horrible like so exhausting ( I am still currently in the process) everything I wanted came with some sort of challenge, broken, impossible or just not do able. For example I got brand new couches BRAND NEW and they came with all these like lint on them from being wrapped up (minor but it's been a headache getting the lint off). Got a new table kitchen and the drawer can't close. Had a decor idea for our room and my husband for the life of him can't drill the holes needed. My fries fell like randomly and almost on my new couch. Like wtf- I could actually keep going but I wont!

All these things I shared either on social network or with "friends" and family. I actually have a person in mind when I think of Mal de ojo sometimes I am like nahh the blessing from God can't be block but other times I am like umm God whats  going on - I picture God doing the kanye shrug not even sure himself!

See there are things at all I dont share with anyone but occasionally my mother if I need some type of guidance or whatever and those things are solid! If they have issue is not random. Its LEGIT ISSUES.

So to test to see if it is just pure ol coincidence all at the same time or if its really some type of shade being thrown over this way I've decided to cut instagram, snap chat and post less on FB I just feel like the less ppl know the better it goes to me. Its funny because I believe I have 0 viewers because I am afraid to share my blog to my circle but anyways to my imaginary audience.

So tell me do you believe in Mal De Ojo? Am I bugging?


XOXOXO

Part Deux- The Big Chop- Reactions

After doing the big chop I got a lot of reactions and more "not so nice" than anything else. I mean I knew I would get reactions but I also sort of wished no one would notice. I wish no one would blink twice but if anything the opposite happened. I was prepared for it or maybe I wasn't. 

I get it. I am a "classic" girl I am not the edgy rebellion type. I have worn my hair straight and in pony tails for 29 years. For the most part straight, curling iron curls/wave, a ponytail and a messy bun was my signature look. So I know this is huge difference for me. Hello! I am the girl who didn't even like trimming her ends! 

Ppl are treating my cut like its a pink elephant not sure how to bring it up and when it's brought up its to let me know how they don't like it as if I asked them. Or to point out how "unattractive" my hair is. 

If I am honest I don't care for my fro and I often run my hands through my hair looking for my pony tail but you know what I don't care if I don't like a short cut because my heart loves it. My heart feels so brave and courageous, it feels at peace. It feels like for once it did something for itself. My heart is elated because my hair hid so many beautiful features like my eyes, the freckles on my face, the shape of my brows, my lips. 

My hair took from that and now all focus is on me and me only. I made a move for a healthier hair and instead of ppl taking note that she is doing something for herself and a healthier move  they felt the need to ask my husband if "do you really like it?" 

So umm Mom, you mean to tell me my husband only married me because I had straight hair?!? My relationship is based off hair? Are you telling me mom that I am only beautiful or wanted with long hair?!! And maybe I know that's not what you mean but that's what your saying. (My mom  is a good woman who means well but she wasn't alone with the comments she was one of my best example). 

I eat salad when I want to be healthier and lose weight,everyone is applauding and saying this is the best thing to do. I cut my hair for a healthy more true to me look and I got a "umm what are you doing?!? 

I decided to chop of my hair and try this. I wanted to see what natural curls look and feel. I also told myself If I don't like it I can always go back.

I don't regret it. I feel powerful but sometimes someone will make me feel small by asking me ignorant  questions but tonight a beautiful woman told me how beautiful I am and how if she was me she would keep it like this. I told her how sometimes I feel small and I shared with her a comment someone said not long before we talked. Either way it was refreshing to hear a genuine compliment because my heart needed to hear it

Peace, love and HEALTHY HAIR

The Big Chop part 1

A big big big reason I had a yearning to blog was because of my hair. Yup my hair. So lets get right into it. 

So I wasn't sure exactly how to get to what I want to say BUT I sort of have in the past so I am going to quote one of my older blogs (I edited my own past writing jejeje):

My hair is what some consider NOT to be "Good Hair". We can leave that to discussion on what exactly Good Hair is and who came up with the term and yada yada yada.
As a child I had lots of unruly hair. It was hard to tame. 

Really my "pajon" was or is a big, WILD,THICK,CURLY hair. If you don't have that type of hair, managing it might be difficult. If you don't have the patience to deal with a spoil brat this is a form of punishment from God to you called as a daughter with no good hair. My mother like many other little Dominican girls took me to a salon and relaxed it. I can't even remember the first time I was relaxed but I know I liked how it looked! 

The way it works is you relax your hair and you have that good ol bone straight hair like a China (chee-na). For a long long long time I would go every 6 months and get my hair relaxed with every 2 weeks going to get it blown out. This was normal to me to the point I thought everyone got relaxers. I didn't understand the harsh chemicals I was putting on my head. All I knew was pain is beauty and relaxing is what they meant by that statement. 

Fast forward to NOW. I know now or at least I can agree that there is no such thing as "good hair" Straight doesn't make it good and curly doesn't make it bad. 

Pats self on back - I did a great job with that introduction back than on hair and how it worked in my culture. To make a LONG LONG  story short. I wrote that post because at that time I went "natural" as in I stopped relaxing my hair PERIOD. Like no I thought that was it. I thought that if I stopped relaxing my hair. I could wear my hair curly while still killing my curls with all the heating stuff I did to it. My mother was so proud too she would say oh look how good your hair looks "straight and natural". I'd be so happy like yes look at my straight natural hair.

Over time I realized that natural meant natural as in what God gave you! You know the natural when you don't do nothing to it and let it just do its own thing. Over time everyone and there mother was natural and it all looked very different on each individual to claim this thing called "natural". Overtime I noticed how my "natural curly hair" didn't look so good. In fact it looked horrible if you really sat there and compared it to its potential of what it really can be.

I noticed how much time, money and energy I spent in going to a salon for it to be straight. Or how much I worried how my straight hair would be on day 2 after going to the salon. How I couldn't quite wet it and have a beautiful curly fro to go out and how it was a MUST for me to get it done to look decent. It was getting to the point of exhaustion. If I wanted to go out - I had to wake up early on one of my only 2 days off from work. I'd have to spend $35.00 to get it done. I'd have to find a sitter. I'd have to drive to the salon or ask my husband to take me/get me. Like getting my hair done was becoming a J.O.B and one that I had to pay  money for. I couldn't just wear my hair "natural" because the truth is all the years of non stop heat, chemicals KILLED any curl pattern I had. So natural was not real at least to me it wasn't and getting it straight was a JOB that I did not want.

So I took the easiest and best approach to it I chopped it all. I called my best friend and we went to a barber and I told him to cut off all and any damage hair and I was prepared to go bald if needed. I told no one. It was a simple thing to me. I wanted natural curly hair. I have to start at 1 to get there. I can always straighten it and know what my results will be if I wanted to go back. It was that simple or so I thought.

For now I'll leave it at this. I'll go into the Pandora box that chopping my hair opened in the next post.

Here is a little flipgram with a look at my hair:
*Please note I was not able to put it into order and I literally just went into my phone and grab different pics old and new of my hair!

Later Alligator
XoXo
Melissa

Awkward Introductions

Writing an introduction to anything always sucks! Like how can I tell you all about me, my purpose, my past how do I introduce myself in today's world without writing too much or too little. Like where do I exactly start. Whats a good introduction now a days- I don't even think I know anymore.

I'll start with some basics and see where that takes us.

Hi I am Melissa! Okay now what?

I am turning 30 in April hence my blog name.

I am a Project Manager in the field I graduated in- advertising!

I am Dominican born and raised in the Bronx (very proudly throws up the symbol of the "X").

I am married and madly in love with this man who after 13 years still makes my heart skip a beat or two beats.

My other roommate is this little princess. I gave birth to her almost two years ago. I am madly in love and obsess with her.

Hmmm what else would you or should you know about me. I am the most Extrovert Introvert (does that even make sense) it is so weird and might explain why I also have a slight obsession with social media.

So what exactly has me rolling into my 30s.  A lot of things actually. Everything I mentioned in my introduction has me rolling around, wondering, questioning, doubting, planning, everything mentioned has me thinking. When I say thinking I mean a lot of thinking so much thinking I decided to pick up blogging again for the 30843 time.

So there you go! This blog will take a life of its own and right now I am not sure what that life or direction will be but right now - Hi I am Melissa- what's your name?

XoXo
Meli <3